How to create a boudoir

A boudoir is a lady's private bedroom, sitting room or dressing room. The word Boudoir comes from the French verb bouder, which means "to pout" or to "to sulk". Thus, a woman who was feeling sulky or indisposed could retire to her boudoir or "sulking room" until she felt in a better disposition. A boudoir was a woman's private space which other people could only enter by invitation.

A bit of history

If you imagine living in a French castle, the boudoir was part of the private rooms of a lady. As opposed to a bedroom which was used for sleeping, a boudoir was used for bathing and dressing. Sometimes it was also used for other activities such as reading, embroidering or as a private drawing room for receiving and entertaining intimate acquaintances.

Unfortunately for most woman nowadays, most modern houses do not have the space to create a boudoir or a private space for them. A boudoir can be of incredible value for a woman. I am lucky enough to have an extra room in my house where I have created my own boudoir; a room with a private bathroom that I use to prepare myself before I go out. I also use it for reading, having my beauty treatments and sometimes even for sleeping. My daughter calls my boudoir "the room to make yourself pretty!

Having a boudoir adds glamour as you have your private space to do all those embarrassing things that you rather keep secret. After all, who wants to see his woman having a full wax treatment contorting to reach the unreachable bikini areas? Who wants to wake up next to a woman with curls and a face mask? Not the nicest thing to see your woman dying her hair or doing her toenails!

Another benefit of having a boudoir is that you can create in there the perfect romantic evening when you want to add some variation to your sexual life. Sometimes it is not easy for couples to go out for a weekend or even having a night off in a hotel away from domestic responsibilities. But you can always create a special evening inviting your other half to your boudoir.

You can easily create the ultimate girly glamorous boudoir in an empty white room with the aid of some accessories. I have created my boudoir with a red theme. I have used a white plain room where I have added sensuality with a touch of red for the bedding, and curtains. A couple of scented candles, subdued lighting, some feathered boas and a make up table with all my favourite perfumes.

But lets go step by step on how to create your own boudoir.

1) Once you have managed to create a space in the house for your boudoir all you need to do is create the mood to be at ease, to awaken your sensuality. I believe in awakening all your senses to make you more receptive.

2) Put a lock on the door. The last thing you want is your children bursting in when you are having a bubble bath in a candle lit room with your favourite rubber ducky!

3) This should be a room where you can relax. Clutter is not allowed. Remember this will be your private room, where other members of the family will only be allowed by invitation. This will be your fantasy room. It is not the place to bring your household or work responsibilities. It is the room to get in touch again with your feminine side.

4) Do not clutter your boudoir with furniture. Think about what you need; perhaps a large sofa or a bed, a make up table and an arm chair where you can sit to read a book and enjoy a cup of tea. Everything else is clutter! Avoid adding tv sets, video or cd players which only add to increase electro stress. This is a room to be in touch with your inner self, not a place to watch films of play computer games.

5) Do not forget to add a full length mirror.

6) Accessorise your space with soft cushions, sensual vases overflowing with flowers and objects which please you.

Too often disregarded, touch is as vital as the other senses and it is linked to our desire to be in contact with someone. Skin on skin is the most basic yet the most magical feeling there is. Tactile sensations affect our feelings of comfort and security. The materials that we use make a considerable impact on us. Use fabrics that feel soft and luxurious, a bed with silk sheets, a velvet throw or a long haired carpet are inviting to the touch and have a soothing effect.

The sense of smell: Scented candles, incense and natural flowers all add a subtle scent, rediscover the health benefits of aromatic oils.

Sound: Pleasant sounds can be soothing and refreshing. The sound of bubbling water can be very relaxing and you can find lots of interior water features for very affordable prices.

Sight: Add colour to you boudoir. Colour is vibration and we each respond to it on many levels, consciously or unconsciously. The colour you choose will affect your mood. You can use colour to add depth to your room, to add movement or to create illusions. Choose a theme colour, personally I choose red accents for my boudoir. I find red stimulating and warming. You, on the contrary might prefer green which is restful and refreshing. Whatever colour you choose, make sure it is a colour that suits you. Even better, keep a white room where you can add accent colours according to how you feel.

Lighting can create a mood. Consider investing in a dimmer switch so you can switch the room's mood from bright excitement to smooth and sexy when you feel like inviting your other half to your boudoir.

Remember that a boudoir is not just the look, it is the feel. It is a place to make you feel relaxed and sensual. Your boudoir should be an extension of you: Who you are and what you are.